CORRECTION REGARDING FUNERAL

In the obituary and on the website, it is stated that the hours for Saturday begin at 11 o'clock. This is not completely accurate and seems to have caused some confussion. To clarify; Friday December 10th there will be a 3 hour viewing from 5-8 pm. Saturday there will be a service at 11 am, however, there will be an hour viewing prior, at 10 O'CLOCK. After the service there will also be additional time to pay respects. Website should be updated later this morning.

FUNERAL AND VIEWING TIMES:

                                                               FRIDAY - 5PM-8PM
                              
                                                               SATURDAY - 10AM-12PM (APPROXIMATELY)


THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH.

Love .........Xoxo

Information

Sorry this is so late. I had a very busy and not easy day. Here is the website to Selover Funeral Home located at 555 Georges Road in North Brunswick; http://www.seloverfuneralhome.com/. On the website and in the Obituary (Home News Tribune), it will state that the arrangements for Saturday are from 10-11 am with a service to follow. However, we are looking to change the time a little and hopefully extend it to noon with a service to follow. The Obituary is already printed, but the website will be updated with any changes.

Once again I do not know how to express what everyone's support, prayers, visits, emails, flowers, cards. and well wishes have meant to my Mom and me. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

On top of all the love sent to us, I just found out from Earl Wiggley, (my Mom's boss) that there is a trustfund set up for Broden in memory of my Mom. I'm not quite sure who is was that originally came up with this idea, but to say we feel blessed would be an understatement. Thank you all so very much.

Keep Praying...Xoxo

Tuesday Evening

On Tuesday at 5:30 pm my Mom passed away at home and surronded by love. Services, hopefully, will be at Selover Funeral Home in North Brunswick. Please check back for details.

Thank you so much for all your wonderful messages, emails, calls, and prayers.

Love, hugs and kisses.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE CALL FIRST.

I'm going to be very honest and to the point. My Mom is not doing well and is rapidly declining. She is in a critical state and at this point we can not have an "open door" policy for visitors. Please, please, please call ahead and check to make sure that your visit would be a good idea.  There are bad days and worse days and everyday is, really, getting worse. We understand and appreciate so many people wanting to visit but it's just not a good idea. I hope everyone understands that I am doing what I fell is best for my Mom and that is who it's truly about. Anyone can call on my cell phone which is 732-236-0767 or on my Mom's home phone which is 732-247-1186 to speak to either me or Diana (my mothers best friend who is here from Florida). I would feel very bad if someone prepared and came over and then was not able to visit, so, please call first. Thank you all so much for your understanding.

KEEP PRAYING.......Xoxo

Sunday morning

Made it through the night. I thought yesterday was just a bad day, but today seems worse. This sucks. I'm so confussed and don't know what to do as far as people visiting are concerned. Since I thought yesterday was just a bad day I suggested people call. Well, now I don't know. I'm trying to take care of my Mom and not overwhelm her and still be respectful to the people that want to come over, so..... At this point just come over when you want. We have family from out of state coming this afternoon so that would be the only time for today that I am aware of that extra visitors would jusr be too much. I belive they are coming around noon. Just so people are aware, my Mom's mental state is not good. There are times she understands, but since yesterday afternoon she's been very confussed and today is no different.

KEEP PRAYING....Xoxo

Day by Day

Things around here have been crazy and busy and I apologize for not posting for a few days. I only have a few minutes because I am on my way to my Mom's for the night shift which is about 15 hours or so. Diana does day shift, also 15 hours, so we overlap for a few in the morning and early afternoon. At the moment poor Diana has come down with some sinus congestion and hopefully will feel better soon.

As for my Mom, she is amazing and doing the best she can every minute of every day. Sadly, the days are getting harder and becoming more painful for her. Today was the worst so far. Actually just got a call from my mom and I need to run.

For anyone that wants to visit the door is still open, however, after today maybe a phone call first would be a good idea or just expect that she may sleep the whole time you are here. As far as her diagnosis goes from what the doctor's told us...the sooner the better. Their prediction is that there is not much time left at all. They could be wrong but it would be sad to take that chance and miss an opurtunity to say "goodbye"

Thank you to everyone so much for all your love, prayers, support and visits. Without Broden, Matt, Diana, Uncle Fred and my girlfriend Janet along with all family and friends there is no way this would be possible to get through.

KEEP PRAYING.......Xoxo

Home tomorrow we hope.

Earlier today at the hospital the doctors did a procedure on my Mom and inserted a Plurex Catheter into her right lung. This is needed so she can come home. As far as I know, at the moment, I am to go to the hospital, at some point tomorrow,  to get training from the medical staff and via educational video to learn how to drain the catheter at home. The catheter will hopefully relieve some/any fluid around the lung and make it easier and less painful for my Mom to breath. WOW. Also, earlier today the Hospice Center delivered a bed, oxygen, nebulizer, and various other supplies. So it appears we are all set. We are so excited and nervous (to be honest) to get her out of the hospital and home.

With the help of family and friends (Broden-MY SUPER BIG HELPER, Matt, Diana, and Greg) my Mom's house is decorated for Christmas which is her fovorite holiday (mine too). She is unaware at the moment and I think and hope this will be a happy and welcoming surprise.THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. I'm also planning on having an early Christams for my Mom and Broden which I truly belive both will enjoy.

As my Uncle Fred said in a post earlier today, we belive that my Mom would enjoy some visitors once she's home and settled and that won't take long. It is NOT necessary, at the moment, to call ahead to visit, but if anyone would like to call and see if/when is a good time, feel free to call on my cell phone and I will do my best to answer or call back (732-236-0767). The only thing I ask, as of now, is that we are given just a short time to have our early Christmas which I will post when I know when it will be happening.

Going to try and get a little bit of sleep. Hope everyone is doing well. Thanks to all for your prayers, love, emails/messages and support.

KEEP PRAYING.....Love, hugs and kisses to everyone.

Waiting

(Lisa is running aorund today, so I am trying to fill in for now-Fred)
Not sure if Pat will be home today but there is a lot to do in the meantime to get the house ready for her. Although she was not up to having visitors when she was in the Cancer Treatment Center, once she is settled at home, she would probably enjoy some visitors if you would like to say good bye. She has been in pretty good spirits and Lisa and I think she would like the compnay.

Stay tuned for the next update about when she will be home.

May be coming home

Talked with the doctors, case manager, and rep. from Visiting nurses/Hospice and my Mom may be able to come home within the next few days with Hospice. Will have more information tomorrow. Before they can sent her home she has to have a Plurex Cath. put into her lung that we will be able to drain at home. A hospital bed and other various equipment should be delivered to the house tomorrow in preparation.

I know she wants to come home and it will be nice to see her happy and so close. I think Broden is both excited and scared (me too) but he is hanging tough. He, actually, took it upon himself today to find and talk to the school counselor!!! So impressed and so proud. We are all doing the best we can given the situation.

Keep Praying......Xoxo

Pray for a MIRACLE

I don't know where to begin.

I received a phone call from the Oncologist from CTCA and the biopsy results are in and they are not good. It seems that the Cancer that we were hoping it wasn't going to be....it is.

My Mom has a very, very, very rare and agressive Cancer.


For now she is till in the hospital  and they are trying to make it possible to bring her home and at that point we will get Hospice and just try to make every day the best we can.

Aside from this message the hardest thing I've done in my life to date is telling Broden. My beautiful, sweet, innocent little boy who love his "Gamma" so much is going to have to learn at the young and tender age of 7 how to say "goodbye to someone that means the world to him.

We were hoping to have a "Merry Christmas" this year, but at this point it does not appear that's going to happen for us on December 25th, so GOD WILLING we will have it a little early.

Please continue praying for my Mom and for my Broden too.

Hugs and Kisses

Saturday Novemebr 27th

WOW. It's been almost a week since I was last able to post and a LOT of things have taken place since then. I'm not sure that it's necessary to go into all of it, when the most important part is that my Mom was taken via ambulance to the ER department last night and was admitted at 4 am to the Critical Care Cluster on the Oncology Floor.

Against my will and better judgement we (Matt and I) brought my Mom home on Tuesday from CTCA (Cancer Treatment Center of America) in Philadelphia. I understood that she wanted to be home for the Holiday but considering her physical health and mental status I did NOT think this was a good idea, but did it anyway hoping I was being over cautious. Unfortunately, I was NOT being ridiculous.

Last time I took her home from the hospital it was St. Peter's and it was for 4 days and she then became an Emergency Admission in CTCA. This time she was home for 3 days and became and Emergency Admission to Critical Care.

It seems that her lung (right side with Cancer) has filled up again and that fluid has accumulated around the outside of the lung. The fluid in the lung can be forced out with medication, it's the exterior fluid that is threatening. This fluid becomes too heavy and can collapse the lung. So, this afternnon, they will be doing another Thorasic Procedure (also done at CTCA) to remove the fluids. They go in through her back and take it out. The first time this was done in CTCA it took about 18 days for the fluid to build up to a dangerous level. This time it took 8 days.

Also, she was sent home with 24/7 oxygen, breathing treatments, and a lot of medication. A normal and good breating rate of oxygen is 97. Anything below 90 will cause the machine to start blinking red to notify the staff that the person has reached an inappropriate level. My Mom has been running at 82-87 without oxygen. As of last night in the ambulance she was at 77 oxygen and while in the ER she dropped to 62 oxygen. She is currently on 100% oxygen which can only be used for short term because at long term it has many many serious side effects - one of them being blindness. They have tried to slowly take her off 100% and use a regular oxygen tank and have been unsuccessful. So, as of right now she is on 100%.

Hopefully, after they do the draining they will be able to change her oxygen supply and amount.

At this point there is still no diagnosis or primary. This means that NO CHEMO can be started. The only information I was given by CTCA is that this is a very, very, very rare and agressive Cancer. Until the biopsy results come back no more information is available.

Due to the fact that my Mom is on a mask she can NOT talk on the phone. I'm not sure about visitors, but at this point would have to say that it's "not a good idea" for people to be going to see her.

I think I've included everything, not sure. Only have 1 working brain cell left and it's not at full strength!!!!

Will try and post again soon. Thank you everyone for your thoughts, prayers and emails. We love you all.

Hugs and Kisses.

KEEP PRAYING...........

Saturday Novenber 20th

THANK GOD FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

Oh my goddness everyday is just amazing and not necessarily in a good way.

Friday was a rough day for all.
 After enjoying Thursday so much with Matt and Broden and having a decent visit with my Mom the winds changed drastically. I woke up after 3 hours of sleep to a fever and some kind of stomach virus. At first I thought I may have had food poisoning (familiar feeling because I've had it before) but after a few hours realized that it was probably just a stress related issue. I went back to bed for a while, comfortably, because I knew that Uncle Fred and Diana were both visiting my Mom. When I did wake up I called the hospital only to find out that they had to drain 750ml's from my Mom's right lung and were staring the first of 2 blood transfusions.

This was a huge unexpected occurence. So, after going to Target to get a thermometer to make sure I did not have a fever, I went to the hospital to see for myself what was going on. To be honest it wasn't good. It seems that after they drained the fluids from her lungs she was doing better but unfortunately it was short lived. Pat was totally exhausted and not feeling well at all. We spend some of our time together just crying, holding hands, and hugging. At this point we both admitted that we are very scared but NOT giving up.

I stayed for hours and left so my Mom could sleep. I arrived back at my lonely hotel room thinking to myself that this was just 1 bad day....and spent the whole entire sleepless night thinking and concentrating on the good days that were sure to come and then,  Saturday came.

None of the doctors or mediacl staff can figure out why but my Mom got violently sick early Saturday morning and it lasted for many hours. I don't know how anyone who really hasn't eaten can vomit for hours but it is possible. I arrived back at the hospital on Saturday to find a totally wiped out Mom. During all this her blood pressure also went very high and they think it was just due to the complete stress her body is in. We spent the day together and the vomitting stopped and she was able to get some sleep. When I left at 8 o'clock she seemed to be stable and was able to drink some water. Slowly, her blood pressure started to go down and she was still being closely monitored. Sunday will be a whole new and BETTER day - for sure.

So, I am now home for the first time in a week and am going to try and enjoy some time with my favorite and most loved 7 year old. I'm not sure when I will be going back to CTCA. I know that there are quite a few visitors planned for tomorrow (Sunday) and both my Mom and I are so grateful. I may go back to CTCA tomorrow night and stay there until Monday night when I would have to leave to be back home for a school event for Broden on Tuesday morning. If only I could split in two.....

So, keep all fingers crossed. Hopefully Sunday will be a better day and the beginning of many to come. From what I've been told the Biopsy results may be back on Tuesday.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU to everyone.

KEEP PRAYING. Love hugs and kisses.

Thursday-November 18th

It's been a few days since I last wrote anything, been very busy. We are both still here. Pat is still at CTCA in Philadelphia and I spend most of my time there with her and we are still waiting for answers. They have done some more test, bloodwork, analysis' of various areas and there are no concrete answers yet. I can't believe it's been so long and still nothing. Waiting and not knowing is a living hell.

As far as her attitude and spirits go she is actually doing better than in the beginning of the week. Sometimes she is confussed, sometimes scared, sometimes sad, but overall trying her best. We were both very lucky this week and got to see Broden on 2 seperate ocassions. Her eyes always sparkle when she sees him, as do mine. He is such an amazing little boy.

It was mentioned earlier today that she may be discharged tomorrow, but at 7pm it was still unclear.

Tomorrow is a brand new day. Hanging in there.

Thank you all so much for your support in all the ways it's been shown.

Keep Praying........Xo

From Philadelphia

Wow. What a day. i don't remember what I posted last time and am too tired to look, so..... we had an appointment at CTCA (cancer treatment centers of america) for this morning at 10 am. Originally we were going to drop Broden at school and drive into Philadelphi then but my Mom had a really bad Sunday morning and afternoon, so we drove to the hotel last night. We then went to CTCA at 10 o'clock and started our first day or our 3 day assesment/consultation and as of 2:30pm my Mom was admitted to the Cancer Hospital as an Emergency.

I had to come back to the hotel to grab a few things (30 minutes each way) and when I left they were putting in an IV, drawing blood, giving something for pain, and starting fluids.

I was told by an Oncologist prior to admission that they want to do tests that were not done in St. Peter's. She mentioned a Colonoscopy, MRI of the brain, Biopsy (new site), Pet Scan and a few others.

Hopefully these tests will be done soon and the answers will be quick and informative.

Will be heaidng back to the CTCA Hospital in a litle while and, probably, be staying there. She is in a private room and there is a couch I can sleep on.

That's all I have for now.

Keep Praying........Xoxo

Pat

Okay, so this is the first few free moments I have at home. My Mom was released form the hospital late Wednesday night and I have been spending all time there including sleeping. So,.....

There was a 2nd biopsy done and unfortunately the results were the same as the 1st one - inconclusive. Meaning they still can not find the Primary Cancer Source and until that is done they can not begin any Chemo.

Since our experience at St. Peter's and with this specific Oncology Group has been awful, we will be going on Monday to the Cancer Treatment Center of America in Philidelphia. We will be there anywhere form 3-5 days for a consultation. I'm praying that they will be able to help us. Everyday that goes by and nothing is done is a day wasted that I (or anyone else) can not get back. Hopefully things will start to happen in Phili.

Thank you to everyone for the calls, emails, and prayers. We can not express how much all of it means. Thank you.

Keep Praying.........Xoxo

Hopefully Soon

My cousin Kristine was Sweet enough to set this up a few days ago. I'm hoping to be able to "post" tomorrow about what's been going on with my Mom. Thank you so much for all the visits, calls, emails, texts, cards, flowers/planrs, fruit baskets, muffin baskets, candy/cookies and PRAYERS. The support is amazing and so appreciated. Thank you all so very much.

Keep Praying...

Test

Test, test 123. This is the first post on the blog to keep everyone up-to-date on Pat.